You Too Can Be Bipolar!
May 22, 2009 Help Yourself
Friday Night just turned to Saturday morning (I’m being deceitful because I sit on the East Coast while my website is comfortably hosted on the West. Some things I just didn’t have the heart to transition).
I’m sitting on my sofa. Laptop on my lap. After a days of extreme highs and lows, thinking about how I perceive the world, and how much the world has shaped me.
The highs I experienced today were manic. No caffeine rush, no sugar, and I don’t take prescriptions. These highs were natural, but there were no triggers that I recall to create them.
That’s when my wife said: “I wonder if you’re bipolar?”
Wait, what?
Never in my life has this been a question. I’ve never been hyper or suffered attention deficit issues. I have had boughts of situational depression, and know a good funk or two, but internally I never perceived myself as being anything short of mentally strong.
So I immediately dismissed my wifes suggestive reasoning. But, my subconsious never let go of her words.
“Bipolar?”
“HA! No way! Never! That’s genetic, not conditional.”
“Are you sure?”
“Hmm… now that I think about it….”
Now before you or I get ahead of myself and the rest of this post, I’m not about to go off and self diagnose any possible ailment based on a single observation. I have plenty of reasonable doubt that I would not meet the criterion for a diagnosis. Or even come close. But I will entertain the thought of a deep and thorough internal self evaluation. It’s great therapy to give yourself a reality check every once in a while.
Here’s where it gets interesting. I’ve been married to a bi-polar sufferer for 8 years now. The observations made of how she handles, diffuses, and manages anxieties and stresses have been spectacular. The highs and states of elation were also spectacular. It’s the violent swings in the middle that can be horrifying. This medical condition is very real regardless what recent controversies may suggest.
Somehow I ended up in marketing. But if dollars wouldn’t have influenced me, I would have easily ended up in the fields of sociology or anthropology. I’m fascinated by human interaction, cultural influence, religion impact, and the conditioning that occurs with individuals. I strongly believe that each persons unique identity isn’t really his/her identity and it really isn’t all that unique. It’s the result of the culmination of thousands upon thousands of influences being applied to that person over time. I think being in marketing isn’t too far of a stretch in a sense, as it’s all about finding wasy to influence certain demographics to take a certain action (buy something, consume something, interact with something). Most people herd in the same direction, you just need to find their triggers.
It is with this same fundamental core that I strongly believe that environment can create certain emotional imbalances and possible dysfunctions as well.
It is with this core that I feel that even though I’m a mentally stable, logic processing, emotionally level individual, that I can still be capable of firing internal and external indicators that I may be bipolar. I’m not, but after living with a diagnosed bipolar and intimately observing behavior during manic episodes for 24, 48, sometimes 72 hours at a time, that I’m not at all surprised that I too can mimic some of these behaviors. Unintentionally. Subconsciously.
Today, my logic and processing were all still on cue. But my behavior and my energy were visibly manic to an outside observer. Internally, in addition being elated, even my heart rate was up. I was truly on cloud 9! And this is the only possibility I can have for describing it (unless I have a tumor. That’s always what happens on House at least).
I was suffering shadow syndrome symptoms. Fascinating!
Tags: bipolar, shadow syndrome
For Me Moment
Apr 16, 2009 Help Yourself
There is an event in life that I’ve been trying to coign for sometime now. It’s when something happens to you that, while may not be entirely kosher, is meant just for you. It’s a moment when you can smile and think to yourself “You know what, life isn’t that bad after all”.
I call it the “For Me Moment”. Or vice versa “Moment For Me”. Either way, it works.
A For Me Moment is when the karmic universe pays back its dividends. It’s when Life, the universe, God, protective angels, or whatever you feel is watching over you, sends you a confirmation. A wink. A nod. An exploding fist bump.
For example, I went to the bar with my brother-in-law and his wife while they were in town visiting. I was the designated driver and there for the wings. 
I was just chillin’ and enjoying hanging out with my relatives. That’s when a group of girls, attractive ones too, bought me a drink. That, my friends, was a For Me Moment. Now I’m a married man and wouldn’t act on anything, but I totally appreciated the gesture. I passed on the drink to my bro-in-law, made sure to give them thanks and cheers, and explained I was DD and we were getting ready to go. Then we left and I was grinning the entire way back.
I’ll admit, most For Me Moments usually involve (attractive) members of the opposite sex. It can be as simple as a someone doing a double take when they see you, with obvious signs of showing attraction. It could be a mutual friend telling you that someone thinks you are cute. A moment can be simple eye contact with a sexy girl at the city pool. It can be the bikini top that gets adjusted when she exits the water, giving you a sneak peek just because you happen to be looking that way. You’re the only one who saw, but she sees you and smiles while quickly fixing the wardrobe malfunction. You nod or wink back. “Thanks for the freebie, ma’am.” Yes, that’s a moment that was meant just for you! (This one happened to be my wife, which made it even better!)
Moments For Me don’t always have to be about attraction. For example, the other day I was dead tired. I had been up all night with my sick daughter. I left work early to go home to what I assumed was going to be more stress in helping manage the house and kids. I wasn’t looking forward to it all. Once I arrived home, my wife said without being prompted “Katie’s asleep, and Joey and I are going to the store. Why don’t you take a nap?” That moment was totally for me. I laid my head on my pillow with a big grin, and fell asleep to one of the best naps I’ve had in years (yes, years)!
A simple, unsolicited, accolade or “job well done” from a co-worker or employer is a moment. Finding unexpected cash in your wallet or sock drawer can be a moment. Getting a restaurant tab adjusted to free or significant discount without expecting it (even if it was to correct an error they may have made), can be a moment. Or simply hitting all green lights on a road that is notorious for stopping you at every light can be a great moment.
Simply put, a For Me Moment can be anything that happens outside of the norm’ that lets you know things are going to be just fine!
(And for the record, you can say For Me Moment or Moment For Me, or some other variation that works for you. Just don’t abbreviate it because that would be 2/3 gay).
Tags: for me moment, moment for me
2009: Be Passionate
Jan 1, 2009 Blog General, Business & Marketing, Help Yourself
Happy New Year everybody!
As I contemplate whether or not I should write a 2008 wrap-up post, I decided one thing for sure: I’m ready to get rolling with 2009! Just a few days ago I wrote about being resolute. Today I’d like to follow-up with the first step in how to be resolute: be passionate!
Passion drives everything. Period.
With passion comes recognition, respect, and personal growth. Your friends and peers will turn to you as the expert for what you are passionate in. You may even gain a small following, earn some extra income, and possible see that passion explode into a huge career.
Without passion, you might as well report to your 9-to-5 at that cubicle job or department store, pick-up your bi-weekly paycheck, cash it at the check cashing store, and promptly find the nearest bar where someone else will be paid to hear how bad your life sucks. I know a lot of people fit that mold. If you are one of them, BREAK OUT OF IT ALREADY!
How do you break the mold and start being passionate about something in life. Well, for starters: START! You don’t need to be perfect, you don’t need to “wait until I…” or “will start as soon as I…”. No! You can start now!
I took this note to heart as I wrote my first blog post of a project that I’ve waited all too long to, um, start. The title? It’s simply called Get Started. It’s very appropriate here as well, as publishing websites is one of my deepest passions. I love the process of brainstorming and concepting a site, registering the domain, installing my CMS of choice, launching the site, and seeing it become successful. I may lack some detail follow-up work, but I’ve identified that weakness and know how to overcome it. But most importantly, I’m not letting that weakness stop me. I hope to follow my tried and true formulas with IncomeHacks and all my other projects I plan on starting this year.
That post is also relevant because it featured Gary Vaynerchuk. For those who don’t know Gary Vaynerchuk, he’s probably the most passionate person about wine that you will ever see. He’s the host of Wine Library TV. In my post on IH, I talk about how he got started. It was pretty humble. He had a large vision for his internet broadcast when he started it, but I doubt that even he didn’t expect that it would become as wildly popular as it has become. If you watch any of his episodes, you’ll see that his passion for his business shines through in everything he says and does. Passion is the X factor. Wine Library would not have nearly the online presence it has today if it wasn’t for Gary’s passion on the subject.
In fact, what Gary says about passion sums up everything I’m trying to say:
Welcome to 2009. The year of passion.
Tags: be passionate, blogging, gary vaynerchuk, get started, passion, start, website publishing, wine library
